What's been most helpful?

It's probably been multiple things together. A big thing has been opening up to other people. Previously I wouldn't talk about issues. Also support from my friends, my family, and from those at the Early Intervention Service. And picking up new hobbies and trying things out, such as learning guitar and starting volunteer work.

My journey began at rock bottom, having returned to my mothers house with my mental and physical health crumbling. The shedding of my immediate friends, most of my belongings and even the wasting away of my physical health aggravated by drug use merely reflected the shambles and chaos of my mental and emotional landscapes. 

I experienced a difficult upbringing. I had a lot of struggles and I saw a lot of things. There was a strong influence of gangs in my environment and this led me to make the wrong kinds of choices. That was the lifestyle I knew at that time; I was smoking a lot of weed, crack, drinking alcohol, talking nonsense, partying, and other stuff. I couldn’t get up in the morning because I was too wasted, and lost jobs as a result of this. It made me feel disappointed in myself. I was getting involved with serious people and putting myself in dangerous situations.

I found the staff really helpful during my recovery. Communicating with my case manager, doctor and community support worker was a key thing. They could see my condition from a more experienced perspective outside of my own. At first I did not realise that I had an illness because I felt normal. However, my family was concerned about me and searched desperately for help. We finally got help and I found the staff so caring and kind and wanting what was best for me.

You can read more about Stephanie's experiences of psychosis, recovery and Early Intervention here 

At age sixteen, I was doing well at school and I had friends who I had fun with.  This was also the age where my life started to change.

My mum also experiences mental distress. When I was sixteen she became quite unwell eventually needing an admission. She wasn’t sleeping well, she became addicted to sleeping pills, she would be talking nonsense and pacing around, saying that she doesn’t want to be here anymore. This was very difficult as a 16-year-old to experience. What helped get me through that, was having something to focus on- study. I was very worried but having something else to think about got me through it. I was also well supported by my boyfriend at the time and his family. He was always there for me, and his family gave me a place to stay when mum needed an admission. Having someone there was helpful, I didn’t feel alone, it wasn’t anything he said or did, he was just alongside me.

At 18 years old I was very confused about what to do after school, but I ended up choosing to study Landscape Architecture. I completed a year of this and passed everything, even with As. I had a new boyfriend who I lived with, with his family while studying. Life was quite simple at this stage and I was very focussed on study. In my free time my boyfriend and I enjoyed gaming and watching tv and going out on walks.

Before this happened to my son Sam, my understanding of psychosis was that it only affected deeply disturbed people who lived in the shadows of society. How wrong that stereotype is.

Supporting our young adult through psychosis has been heart-breaking exhausting and at times overwhelming. But I am also very thankful because psychosis has bought our son back to us.

During his late teenage years he started slipping away from us; becoming more distant, difficult and disengaged. Although I had managed to get him to his GP on several occasions, I was not aware of the extent of his distress or the speed at which his life was spiralling downwards.